Tuesday, March 26, 2013

On Being a Good Woman

Are you the “perfect woman”? 
                Do you have every verse of Proverbs 31
                Do you have a husband
                                That you
                                                Cook for
                                                Clean for
                                                Pray for
                                                Submit to
                                                Sometimes resent and
                                                Sometimes annoy but still
                                                Make love to every night
                                                Loves you
                                                Sacrifices for you
                                                Is the head of you and your household
                                                Even when he
                                                Says or does dumb things
Do you have six children
                                That you
                                                Nurse until they are 3 years old
                                                Teach to be perfect Christians
                                                Love you
                                                Call you “Mommy”
                                                Get fingerpaint on your walls and
                                                Spit-up on your clothes
                                                Forget field trip permission forms
                                                And ask you to decorate impossible cakes for their 

Do you know how blessed you are…to know who you are…to be a good woman?

Are you the perfect woman?
                Are you the quintessential feminist who
                                Burns your bras
                                Supports reproductive rights and
                                Women’s health care
                Do you have a career that is
                                Difficult to juggle with your 2.1 kids
                                                And so you lobby and
                                                Blog and
                                                Facebook and
                                                In support of
                                                                Equal rights and
                                                                Equal pay and
                                                                More support and
                                                                More respect
                Have you made peace with
                                Your genitals and
                                Your sexuality and
                                Your right to good sex
                Do you know that God wants you to be
                                Stunningly orgasmic
                                Fertile on your terms
Do you have academic credentials from
                                All the right schools
                                With all the right mentors
                                                Who taught you
                                                                That once you were enslaved
                                                                In bondage
                                                                Held captive
                                                By the patriarchal traditions of the world
                                                And now you know that
                                                God wants you
                                                                To be free
                                                                To be a good woman

Do you know how blessed you are…to know who you are …to be a good woman?

This is for the woman who is not a good woman…
                She has no husband and
                No children
                She likes bras because
                Her boobs hurt without them
                She has a career but
                Hates Oprah
                She has no voice in the mommy wars but is
                Tugged by both sides
                She knows that “blessed are the wombs that never bore and the 
                breasts that never nursed”
                Means her
                But she cannot support the death of children she would gladly bear 
                and nurse
                Blessed or not
                Even in defense of women
This is for the woman who is not a good woman…
She gets looks from the good women
                Looks that silently and
                Accusingly and
                Painfully ask
                What is wrong with you
                Why aren’t you a good woman
                Don’t you love God
                Don’t you love yourself

This is for the woman who is not a good woman…
                She silently
                Trods along behind her God
                She wonders if she loves Him enough
                Or if she loves herself enough
                And maybe that is why
                She is not a good woman
                Why she is alone
                Knowing hardly a one who can
                Understand or

This is for the woman who is not a good woman…
                She continues to trod
                Because God or
                Fate or
                Destiny or
                Has given her no other option
And so she tries
Although it is hard
                To trust that His promises are
                For her
                Even for her
                The woman who is not a good woman…

1 comment:

Erin said...

I think you are the best kind of woman. I love this post, because it is authentic and relate-able. I wish I was better at understanding. I can sense the struggle and pain, but finding just the right thing to say is not easy, especially because I don't have answers. I find you very companionable, and lovable to the max, and the rest is an enigma to me. One that makes me want to smack lots of people...men, and the women that cause you to feel less than a good woman. You are a treasure in my life.

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My Comments Policy: "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23